Last Friday was day 5 of my second surgery in 3 months. I woke up crying. My tears were very close to the surface. All day!

I cried.

It might have been the surgery but there was a lot more going on.

I cried.

It might have been that it was the 32nd anniversary of my brother, Tim’s, passing. I ached for my sister-in-law and my nephew and niece. Tim's been gone for so long. The kids were just 14 and 12 ...My sister-in-law was such a young Widow. She raised those kids alone and did a great job.

It might have been for my friend HC who has had to have another PET scan because they told her the tumors were growing again. Like every other time - HC is strong and is facing the next round of chemo with dignity and grace and hope and perseverance.

It might have been that our world is in such turmoil. There are wars in so many areas and in so many countries. There are fires raging in just about every country in North America and Europe. Because of these fires and wars, children are losing not just their stability and peace, not just their homes and their toys but even their lives. Even now, my sister's grandson, is fighting a forest fire in Northern Ontario.

It might have been for an acquaintance whose husband just died and now she is a widow.

It might have been for friends who aren’t sure what the future holds.

I had planned to spend the morning on the beach reading and reflecting and praying. It was a perfect summer day really. I walked my regular route and even though it was early, I watched happy dogs fetching sticks out of the lake. I watched a woman head out on her board for her morning paddle. I watched a swimmer doing his lengths, back and forth, back and forth.

Even as I walked, the tears were pouring down my cheeks. I met someone who I often see on the beach - He saw those tears and offered a comforting word. Another lady from down the beach stopped to chat with me as well and offered a comforting hug. I received a word of comfort and the hug. I needed them. I was blessed by them.

I’m the kind of person who wears her heart on her sleeve. There have been times in my life when my heart has been so sad, that I couldn't even mumble words out loud. There have been times in my life when I've been at church, and I couldn't sing the words that I love. And that's okay.

But there have been times in my life when my heart is so full of joy, that the tears come easily too.

The time that comes to mind right now is when Pete and Heather called to tell me they were moving to Kincardine. For many months, and even a few years, we had been praying that Pete would find a position in Southern Ontario. It was their desire to move “south” before their oldest started High School. In those few years we saw positions come and go. Finally in January of 2024, Pete received a call that he had made the short list for the Bluewater Board. To make a very long story short, on May 7th, they called to say that he had received a position in Bluewater. Not only had he received any old position, but it was right here in Kincardine. I literally shouted for joy and the tears flowed down my cheeks in thanksgiving.

Two Sundays ago... Pastor Spencer preached a message about the prophet Habakkuk. He said a lot of great things that morning but two things stuck with me.

The first thing he reminded us is that when we can't see the whole picture - or we feel depressed - or feel despondent or discouraged - or we feel lame - our memory will remind us of what God has done for us in the past. Countless times God has encouraged me - has blessed me - has sent people to love on me - has answered prayer and - even if I don't feel it, I remember.

The second thing Spencer reminded us of was - Between the promise and the provision…….. Worship. And that's what I did last Friday. I know God’s promise is to heal - to watch over our world - to mend relationships - to strengthen weary hearts - to lead and guide and so much more. But sometimes it doesn't happen in a minute. Healing takes time. Relationships take time to mend. People's hearts need to get right before wars will stop. And so until the provision occurs.... I will worship. I will trust. I remind myself of His grace and His favor on my lives of my family and friends.

Tears may last for a night but joy comes in the morning.